oh the holly bears a berry as white as the milk
and mary bore jesus all wrapped up in silk
and mary bore jesus our saviour to be
and the first tree in the green wood it was the holly

oh the holly bears a berry as green as the grass
and mary bore jesus who died on the cross
and mary bore jesus our saviour to be
and the first tree in the green wood it was the holly

oh the holly bears a berry as black as the coal
and mary bore jesus who dies for us all
and mary bore jesus our saviour to be
and the first tree in the green wood it was the holly

oh the holly bears a berry as blood as it is red
and we trust in our saviour who rose from the dead
and mary bore jesus our saviour to be
and the first tree in the green wood it was the holly

i am rather proud of myself this time. most of my pranks make me feel that way. this time it was directed at my roommate. and why should it not? just because i live with him is no real exemption. i am like the government- i tax everyone.

well, this year jeff decorated his fake tree. with lights. just lights. it is very dreary and boring and in need of my special help. so, i called upon my friend who is an elementary teacher. after giving her the whole story, she agreed that her students could make Christmas decorations for his tree. awful ones. the kind only a mother could be proud of. the kind that only a mother could hide deep within the tree so that no one could see them.

looks better already. who does not want a tree like this? it says, “hey look at me- someone cared to decorate me,” “i am a charlie brown tree,” “be sure to put me out after i ignite.”

i am sure that the kids worked really hard and concentrated a lot for about one half of 5 minutes while making the decorations. later that evening i had some friends over so that we could make fun of jeff’s tree. he said it was a fire hazard. pshh! what does he know about fire? he’s neither smokey the bear or a fire marshal. even the angel agrees!

to-morrow i am making gingerbread cookies. and plan on giving them away to people. so- i will be making them legless, armless, cannibals, the billy normal. who wouldn’t eat a rudolph with antlers in the mouth of the gingerbread man riding the reindeer? who i ask?